


The Candlestick

by Atropos_lee



Category: Hornblower (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Live Kennedy Universe, Humor, Humour, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-11
Updated: 2013-03-11
Packaged: 2017-12-04 23:47:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/716448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atropos_lee/pseuds/Atropos_lee





	The Candlestick

While HMS Hotspur is refitting at Plymouth, in the year five, Captain Hornblower is astonished to read in a playbill, announcing the season at the Theatre Royal, that the celebrated artiste, Mr Arthur Dewhurst, is to perform the role of William, in "Black Eye'd Susan", that very evening.

Hastening to the theatre he discovers that it is indeed his oldest and dearest friend, Archie Kennedy, in his new identity, fully recovered from the little difficulty in Kingston, and launched upon his new career as an actor.

Horatio enjoys the show, (particularly the Hornpipe, the Pantomime and the dancing horse), and, calling at the stage door afterwards, invites Archie to dine aboard the ship with Lt Bush and himself the next evening.

The dinner is not a success. Archie can't help noticing how attractive the steward, Doughty is, and how attentive to his captain. He also realises that Bush is in something of a sulk, and is not surprised when he makes his excuses and leaves the table early.

Horatio spots the long appraising look that Doughty receives from his old friend, and the sympathetic glance afforded to Bush, and surmises the cause. When they go on deck to enjoy their cigars, he takes Archie aside and says, "Believe me, my dear friend. Whatever you may believe to the contrary, you must know that I am _not_ sleeping with the servants."

After fond farewells to his old shipmates, the actor returns to his digs, and the Hotspur puts out to sea.

A week later, Doughty comes to Horatio in some distress. A silver candlestick is missing - it hasn't been seen since the night of the Captain's dinner party, and he is afraid it has been made away with.

Horatio questions the marines on duty that night, and, after eliminating the possibility of theft by the crew, is forced to conclude that it was taken by Archie, who, as a struggling actor, must be short of funds.

Hurt by his lack of candour, he writes to Archie, saying, "A candlestick is missing. I'm not implying that you took the candlestick. And I'm not implying that you did not take the candlestick. But the fact remains, that it has not been seen since you were here."

To which Archie writes in reply, "I'm not implying that you are sleeping with the servants.. And I'm not implying that you are not sleeping with the servants. But the fact remains, that if Doughty had been sleeping in his own cot, he would have found the candlestick by now."


End file.
